What Am I Feeling Right Now??

I'm sad....depressed....

I just wanted to share a short story that happened in my life....

And this goes on...

My sister and I went to a Book/School Supplies Store.  I was looking around when a section for bags caught my attention.  I saw a cute bag and I really really like it but it's quite expensive and.. that's the problem.....  I wanted to buy that bag but I don't have enough money to buy that.

When we got home, I said to my mother that I wanted to have a new bag 'coz my old bag was not in a good condition and I think that it will collapse when I put heavy materials on it.  But my mother just scolded at me and said that she don't have money to buy that thing.  And she also said that my old bag is good enough for me to use this incoming school year.When I heard that, I cried..... By the way, I've been using my old bag when I was in elementary (now I'm in 2nd year HS).  When my sister bought a new bag, she gave to me her old bag,.....

What I've done?? Am I a sinner?? Maybe..... I could understand why my parents are like that 'coz we're not rich....... I'll try to understand.......

Also, my family ( not all), .one time, they got disappointed when I got 7th in our class.  They always say to me  that because of computer, I can't focus on my studies but I don't think that's reason... Am I an idiot??? When I was elementary, I graduated as valedictorian so they're expecting that I'll also become valedictorian or salutatorian or neither on the top 5, but, what can I do if that is only what I can?  I don't want to make them disappointed but what else can I do??

Now, I'm depressed and so down.  But I have these friends that always beside me.  Even if they don't have high IQ's or they're not honor students, they're still my friends.  They can understand me if I tell to them what my feelings are.  I can share to them my problems unlike my family. My friends always say that their proud of me 'coz I'm studying in a science high school.

One time, when my friends and I were having a fun time, I've just realized that no matter how intelligent you are, If you don't have these friends, your useless, your invisible.. :)

I'm happy together with my friends.. ;)